Monday

clarification

I think I have lost touch at my poetic writing skills. Maybe because i realize, I used to write so good when Im sad and down, and that rarely happens nowadays. i want to write like I used to, but I hate sounding emotional. But anyways. Im admitting here, that in this blog, I will vent about guys a lot. Sounds desperate, but whatever. My blog anyway.

I here clarify that I am not heartless, or picky as most of you claim me to be. I just simply am not ready for a relationship or some sort, although sometimes I think I need to be in one. I have my funs with guys, physically. Honestly, I'd rather have a once-in-a-while physical-only relationship with a guy. Emotionally, I guess I am not ready to open up or let myself appear vulnerable to anyone. It feels like I'm losing, and I dont like the feel of losing? I like thinking I'm in control, and that boys cant bring me down, neither can a girl, speaking of. Not to mention, my confidence has galloped so high lately. I dont know why, it's like I have no fear of rejection, something I use to have a lot. Like I no longer care about other judgements towards me. This should be good right?